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SNEEEZY
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« on: March 21, 2007, 07:43:43 PM » |
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My two daughters each received an invitation to a birthday party for a very casual acquaintance.
The invitation states:
"Please bring at least $20.00 to help pay for the limousine."
I'm appalled at the blatant request to help foot the bill, especially since the birthday child has been frequently mentioning the gifts/giftcards he'd like to receive.
The closing line of the invitation states "(daughter's name) is offered to attend."
I guess it's not really an invitation, but an offer to attend IF you pay at least $20.00 for the limo.
I honestly don't think this child's mom has a clue about how she's setting her son up for a major disappointment. I'm unsure about how to approach this mom to talk to her about this situation. It would be absolutely horrible if no one shows up because of the request to help pay for the limo. It's hard enough being a teenager without adding this kind of stress to a child's psyche.
This child will be 15...
Advice? Opinions? Comments?
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 Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly. Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably...and never regret anything that made you smile. |
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MisBehave
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« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2007, 08:23:09 PM » |
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Wow that's an invite I have not come across yet.
First thing that popped in my head was "Oh dear we already have plans for that day"
If the teenager has already been "frequently" dropping hints about gifts It would get me wondering if I'd really want my kid to be associating with someone so materialistic, but not knowing the teen it's not fair for me to judge.
I could almost understand if the limo was the child's present and the parent had already talked to the guests' parents, before invitations were sent out, and asked, "Would a group present of a limo ride be okay with everyone?".
I'm still confused on why a fifteen year old gets a limo. As for talking to the parent, which I probably wouldn't bother, you could always say,"Wow what a great idea $20.00 for a limo in place of a gift!" :P
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SNEEEZY
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« Reply #2 on: March 21, 2007, 08:56:35 PM » |
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My daughters don't hang out with this particular child, but they've told me that he seems to invite himself to functions & such.
I just looked at the "invitation" again and I just realized that the party is on Mother's Day!
The girls DO already have plans...every Mother's Day we go to the strawberry field off Bruce Rd. in Chesapeake and pick tons of strawberries. (We even have mens' size white tshirts that we wear year after year that we proudly wear with the strawberry stains!)
Anyhow, they won't be able to attend--even if I considered letting them attend, which I'm not going to allow.
Not sure why a 15-yr-old needs a limo...but the girls have told me that he passed out invitations to nearly everyone in the 6th, 7th, & 8th grade classes.
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Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly. Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably...and never regret anything that made you smile.
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MisBehave
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« Reply #3 on: March 21, 2007, 09:03:49 PM » |
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Do you think the parents even know about his invitations? It's hard for me to see another mother making kids pick between their own Moms and a limo/party. If that's the case I'm glad you have plans on Mothers Day and I'm sure they will have a much better time with you. Strawberry picking, how clever are you. What a cool Mothers day tradition.
:P
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F15eWeapon
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« Reply #4 on: March 21, 2007, 09:16:41 PM » |
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I would offer up this perspective. Unless you're really trying to become friends with this mother, I wouldn't hold my tongue on this matter. I would approach it exactly as you have to us... a concern for the success of the party. Man, talk about a Ms. Manners issue!! I think she would agree that it was RUDE to send an invite requesting that you bring anything. (BYOB is fine for adults time to time...but geez.)
As far as whether or not your kids go or not.... at this age I'd leave it entirely up to your daughters if your budget will allow the entry fee.
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SNEEEZY
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« Reply #5 on: March 21, 2007, 10:19:01 PM » |
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Do you think the parents even know about his invitations? It's hard for me to see another mother making kids pick between their own Moms and a limo/party. If that's the case I'm glad you have plans on Mothers Day and I'm sure they will have a much better time with you. Strawberry picking, how clever are you. What a cool Mothers day tradition.
:P You bring up an excellent point...perhaps his mom isn't aware of the invitations. We pick the berries in the morning and then make strawberry jam later that day. Sometimes their older brothers join us...other times the boys & I will make a separate trip. We have a great time & the jam is dee-lish! mmm...strawberry lemonade & vodka...mmmm!!! |
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Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly. Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably...and never regret anything that made you smile.
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SNEEEZY
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« Reply #6 on: March 21, 2007, 10:27:06 PM » |
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I would offer up this perspective. Unless you're really trying to become friends with this mother, I wouldn't hold my tongue on this matter. I would approach it exactly as you have to us... a concern for the success of the party. Man, talk about a Ms. Manners issue!! I think she would agree that it was RUDE to send an invite requesting that you bring anything. (BYOB is fine for adults time to time...but geez.)
As far as whether or not your kids go or not.... at this age I'd leave it entirely up to your daughters if your budget will allow the entry fee. I haven't had the opportunity to meet the young man; the girls only know him because he's a friend of a friend of a friend of theirs. Affording the entry fee isn't an issue; my biggest issue at this point is that if the mom is aware of this situation (ie: planning it & asking for the $20.00) it's inappropriate and she isn't teaching her son proper rules of society or manners, for that matter. How do you tactfully explain the impropriety of the situation to someone you've never met? (That's a rhetorical question...) |
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Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly. Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably...and never regret anything that made you smile.
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MPETUOS
Sean the Turd Polisher
Moderator
Thread Starter
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Posts: 1499
I'm one of "those" people that don't own a MINI!
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« Reply #7 on: March 21, 2007, 10:44:29 PM » |
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I'd like to take everyone to Ruth Chris' Steakhouse.
Just meet me there and bring $200.
Happy Birthday to Me!!!!!
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My Land Cruiser cancels out 2 Prius ... what is the plural for Prius?  |
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SNEEEZY
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« Reply #8 on: March 22, 2007, 06:22:07 AM » |
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I'd like to take everyone to Ruth Chris' Steakhouse.
Just meet me there and bring $200.
Happy Birthday to Me!!!!! You're so funny! |
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Logged
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Life is short. Break the rules. Forgive quickly. Kiss slowly. Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably...and never regret anything that made you smile.
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HomerJ
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« Reply #9 on: March 22, 2007, 06:38:11 AM » |
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I would just throw away the invitation and never speak of it again.
The "R" in RSVP stands for "Recycle Bin", right??
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AprilWhine
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« Reply #10 on: March 22, 2007, 07:00:49 AM » |
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Have to agree with Homer on this one. If it was a blanket invitation, no need for individual responses. But if you want to get your point across in a subtle way, why not send your regrets to the mom and enclose the original invitation? That way, if it was from the boy, you tattle on him. :mrgreen:
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awood279
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« Reply #11 on: March 22, 2007, 07:14:02 AM » |
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This one kind of blows me away.... I always have a big birthday bash for Andria every year because her birthday is right after Christmas. I know it's coming so I save for it! Not pass the cost along to the parents of the children attending. How tacky!! If we are going somewhere like Jillian's then I may put on the invitation that the birthday party includes a certain amount of game credit and the child is more than welcome to bring extra money. And they fact that it was a "blanket" invitation makes it that much less personal. I would have to say "pass". If the guy isn't even a close friend then it should matter if they don't attend....that is unless this is their entry fee into the cool kids club! LOL!!! Either way....$20 for the limo ride...Plus another $30 for a gift....forget that! Dang kids, they get more & more expensive!!!  As for the parents, I don't really think it's necessary to make a stand and call them and explain to them the error of their ways. If someone called me and criticized my party throwing skills I would hang up on them....even if I was in the wrong. Just simple throw the invitation away and move on with things. Just my opinion!  |
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fool68
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« Reply #12 on: March 22, 2007, 07:37:18 AM » |
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Not only is the request tacky, but the notion of providing a limo for a teenager's birthday party is rediculous. A caravan of MINIs? Well, that I could see provding some funding for. A limo? Forget it :-)
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Cajun
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« Reply #13 on: March 22, 2007, 07:54:13 AM » |
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Now If we are talking MINI limo, then we have something there and I would say go for it.  |
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MisBehave
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« Reply #14 on: March 22, 2007, 08:02:01 AM » |
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:lol: :lol: :lol:
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